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My Life In Liberty City
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ABigSoggy Wafle
devilbutt
Masterofkills09
Made in Finland
Spiderman
Applederp
AaUndeadMarine
zombie dude
Cry Vengeance
Kylectt74
14 posters
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My Life In Liberty City
My life had gone down the tubes. I lived in Indiana, I felt that I needed a change of pace so I moved to Liberty City, I had lived there three months. I had tried to join the local police force. I kinda got revoked because I wasted all My time at the gun range. So... I joined the gun club. It was fun, except that the president was a total psychopath. I had no good life ahead of me.I was leaving the gun club meeting and had saw a man in an alley. I screamed, HEY!" He said nothing.I pulled my gun and screamed again. He ran at me i shot him in the chest. He didn't flinch! I shot again and nothing happened he just kept running. I took 3 last shots into the head. He finally dropped. He smelled awful, like he was already dead for a week. I saw another and another run toward me. So I got into my car and sped off
Part 2: Coming Soon
Part 2: Coming Soon
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Cool, I just don't understand why you would find somebody standing in the alley strange, then pull a gun on them....
-shrug-
-shrug-
Re: My Life In Liberty City
have you ever seen a man standing in an alley cry, its a very frightening site.
zombie dude- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1305
Re: My Life In Liberty City
sounds pretty Ok. not meaning to be a mean critic or jerky english teacher but. like they said it sounds a little odd how you pull a gun on a man in an alley. and I might of been the only one to notice it but you used a whole lot of I's and He's. so too much first person talk. maybe just try to fix these and it should be average
AaUndeadMarine- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1290
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Why pull a gun on a guy in an alley?
Why not in the middle of a busy street?
Why not in the middle of a busy street?
Applederp- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 4
Re: My Life In Liberty City
How can a man stand unresponsive in an ally...and why would he want to....
Spiderman- Troll
- Posts : 1010
My Life In Liberty City Pt. 2
They had kept running and running I looked behind me, the dumbest mistake. I crashed into a wall. It was dark, "Was I dead?" I thought. "when i came to I saw my car was surrounded by the weird people. They had blood dripping from their mouths, their bodies were wounded and gross. I'm fucking dead.
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Keep your story in one thread, please. Otherwise this whole section will be full of your threads. And if you're gonna make a sotry, atleast put some effort to it. 3 rows of text a chapter is not a real story.
Made in Finland- Definition Of Sarcasm
- Posts : 3698
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Jesus Man that was negative but yeah ill do that
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Merged both topics.
-Master
-Master
Masterofkills09- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1170
Re: My Life In Liberty City
I cannot play ZOMBIE MODE....I had an invite from deadape but said full instantly i would love to be apart of this....how long does this go though the night..? sorry for off topic post.
devilbutt- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 9
My Life in Libery City Pt. 3
I saw a bright light, I'm sure it was death. The image cleared to show that it was a man shining a flashlight in my eyes. I could barely hear what they were saying the only things I could seriously make out were: "Do you think he was bitten?" and "Should we kill him now to make sure?" I could make out that one of the people was a woman. I saw my gun on a desk to my right and reached for it. Unfortunately the tranquilizer was incredibly strong and I could barely move. I fell back asleep. I woke up at what I assumed was about three hours to the doctor and the other woman. I had stumbled to my feet and walked toward a mirror. I looked at my body. There was a large bloody bandage covering up most of my left arm. The doctor came up to me and said, "Thank God you're alive, now tell me were you bitten?"
"What? By Who?"
"The Zombies of course."
Oh My Fucking God...Zombies.
"What? By Who?"
"The Zombies of course."
Oh My Fucking God...Zombies.
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
My life in LC pt 4
I couldn't believe it, my family, my friends, gone. I grabbed my Glock and went outside. The death, the train derailed. I saw a harley and drove off, luckily the keys were in there. I went to the old gun shop. So, I grabbed a double barrel and sawed off the end. I got back on the bike and drove into the street. I noticed one of the zombies beside me. I grabbed the sawed off and blew its head to chunks. I drove off to find out if any of my friends and family were alive. I drove to the strip-club, my cousin used to work there. I grabbed my shotgun and went inside. I walked cautiously inside. The place was empty, the emptiest I've ever seen. Ha. I went into the management room and saw one of the strippers eating the guts out of my cousin, I gagged but my body wouldnt let me puke. I aimed, I fired, but this place wasn't as empty as I thought. On the moniter I saw that the place was getting filled with zombies. One burst into the room. It tackled me to the ground, I wrestled with it, and it was reaching in to take a chomp out of my skull. I remembered the knife I hid in my shoe. I grabbed it and plunged into the zombies skull. I looked at the moniter and saw that the zombies were heading toward the moniter room. The door burst open and several men came in and shot down the zombies.
The man who looked like the leader came in and said, " What are you doing here?"
"Well I was checking on my cousin."
"Who do you think you are? Niko Bellic?"
"What?"
"Nevermind, you can call me... DeadApe."
The man who looked like the leader came in and said, " What are you doing here?"
"Well I was checking on my cousin."
"Who do you think you are? Niko Bellic?"
"What?"
"Nevermind, you can call me... DeadApe."
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Alright, alright, I am not going to be absolute prick, but you need to work on as to what happens. At one point he is on his death bed in a hospital and in another he is on a Harley breaking into gun stores. Tell us how is getting from point A to point B doesn't really count as a story. Be more descriptive, read a passage from "Z-day" that should inspire you a bit.
ABigSoggy Wafle- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1833
My Life in Liberty City Pt.5
I closed my eyes, and took a drink of the coffee that DeadApe and his crew gave me at their safehouse. He told me," What brings you to the apocalypse?"
"Well I don't exactly have anything left. How did this even happen?"
" Damn Scientist tried to create a serum to bring people back from the dead."
"Wow. So What exactly do you do?"
"Well, We search for survivors."
"Got that."
"Wait. Weren't you the guy who ran off from our medical center this morning."
"Uh Yeah"
"Shouldn't have done that."
Wel- There was a bang on the door. "Here take this." He handed me an AK. "Aim for the head."
The zombies came in and dashed toward us, I aimed up the sights and fired. They just kept coming. They ran in by the dozens. They bit down two survivors and another man was bitten. The last had finally come in and got mowed down. The bitten man started to freak out and was screaming and jerking. He was starting to turn, his hair fell out, skin was getting pale, his teeth became sharper. DeadApe grabbed a pistol and shot between the eyes.
DeadApe stood up on a chair and said, "We're not safe here, we have to make to the airport. Kyle, you go with Meatshield and Me. There are cars outside we can take them. Let's move out."
Part 6: Coming Soon
"Well I don't exactly have anything left. How did this even happen?"
" Damn Scientist tried to create a serum to bring people back from the dead."
"Wow. So What exactly do you do?"
"Well, We search for survivors."
"Got that."
"Wait. Weren't you the guy who ran off from our medical center this morning."
"Uh Yeah"
"Shouldn't have done that."
Wel- There was a bang on the door. "Here take this." He handed me an AK. "Aim for the head."
The zombies came in and dashed toward us, I aimed up the sights and fired. They just kept coming. They ran in by the dozens. They bit down two survivors and another man was bitten. The last had finally come in and got mowed down. The bitten man started to freak out and was screaming and jerking. He was starting to turn, his hair fell out, skin was getting pale, his teeth became sharper. DeadApe grabbed a pistol and shot between the eyes.
DeadApe stood up on a chair and said, "We're not safe here, we have to make to the airport. Kyle, you go with Meatshield and Me. There are cars outside we can take them. Let's move out."
Part 6: Coming Soon
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
My Life in Liberty City Pt. 6
I followed them out the door, my gun ready for any attacks. I got into the car and DeadApe turned on the engine. I looked behind us...No zombies apparently heard us. He was driving out and he barely dinked a parked car and the alarm went off. SHIT! Zombies started to swarm out of nowhere. "THEY"RE GETTING CLOSER! GO!" I screamed. "I'm trying!" He hit the gas and we zoomed out and the zombies still followed us. They came out of alleys, buildings, even off rooftops! I aimed out and fired. The cars behind us held about 25 people. Two men had to get on Motorcycles due to the lack of space. The zombies had knocked off one of the bikers. 24 left. We found our way to the airport, zombies still on our tail. We got to the five helis and got out of the car the zombie horde had risen from 21 to over 60 zombies! They had tackled two people and cracked their heads like melons. We had gotten into the helis each was able to hold four people....so 2 people would be left behind, one hispanic man and a russian woman volunteered to give their lives. We flew off and left the heroes to the rest. Flying over Liberty City. I had one thing to do. I got out my Ipod and turned on Don't Stop Believing, and I closed my eyes.
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
My Life in Liberty City Pt. 7
I opened my eyes to chaos. Dead was screaming at me to wake up and to look. I looked out the side of the heli and saw that one of the other helis was crashing down into Central Park. We had to land..... we got down and counted our masses we had 16 people left, we went looking for the crashed heli. We saw the smoke and followed it to the source....the heli was trashed, no-one made it out alive. We had to find shelter, the museum was open but we didnt know if it was safe, we sent a scouting squad inside while the rest of us waited. We waited for about 10 minutes and the squad came out, with more people than we had before. There were 7 other survivors. They told us how they needed more food. We roamed the streets of Liberty City looking for food, we had gotten up to the crane and one person lost it.... one of the museum survivors had bitten earlier. He started to turn.... I pulled out my pistol and pulled the trigger, the gunshot was so loud that it attracted a whole horde of them........ To be continued........ later
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
ok, im not trying to be a mean critic, but, after reading the zombie survival guide by Max Brooks, this doesnt seem to much like the real "zombie." im just saying, its the most realistic deescription of zombies ive ever read/heard/etc. but its still pretty good, kinda confusing tho, the story just seems to jump all over the place.
RedrumSalad- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1150
My Life in Liberty City Pt.8
"This is insane! There are 22 of us 6 don't even have guns! How in fuck's sake are we gonna do!" Screaming at me one of the survivors. "SHUT UP MAN! We're gonna climb that crane and shoot down! YOU GOT THAT!" The survivor shut up and ran toward the crane as me and the armed survivors runned and gunned toward the crane.They got up and we climbed up behind them.
One of our guys slipped and fell down to the ground and busted his head againts the concrete,only to have what was left get eatin up. A young girl in front of me on the ladder slipped! I grabbed her by the back of her jacket and pulled her up. We made it to the top and rested.....
One of our guys slipped and fell down to the ground and busted his head againts the concrete,only to have what was left get eatin up. A young girl in front of me on the ladder slipped! I grabbed her by the back of her jacket and pulled her up. We made it to the top and rested.....
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
RedrumSalad wrote:ok, im not trying to be a mean critic, but, after reading the zombie survival guide by Max Brooks, this doesnt seem to much like the real "zombie." im just saying, its the most realistic deescription of zombies ive ever read/heard/etc. but its still pretty good, kinda confusing tho, the story just seems to jump all over the place.
Dude these zombies are not the lumberers they are the dashers like in 28 days later or in Left 4 Dead.
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
Re: My Life In Liberty City
I liked it i thought it was interesting. R u gna do a pt 9?
Last edited by oO Coggy Oo on 8th April 2010, 5:33 pm; edited 2 times in total (Reason for editing : Adding something else)
oO Coggy Oo- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1406
Re: My Life In Liberty City
Kylectt74 wrote:RedrumSalad wrote:ok, im not trying to be a mean critic, but, after reading the zombie survival guide by Max Brooks, this doesnt seem to much like the real "zombie." im just saying, its the most realistic deescription of zombies ive ever read/heard/etc. but its still pretty good, kinda confusing tho, the story just seems to jump all over the place.
Dude these zombies are not the lumberers they are the dashers like in 28 days later or in Left 4 Dead.
ok
RedrumSalad- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1150
Re: My Life In Liberty City
start a new paragraph every time you switch to another persons dialogue
AaUndeadMarine- Cry Owes Me A Custom Title
- Posts : 1290
RE: My Life in Liberty City
Due to.....unusually high request I will write part 9, I just got to think... maybe get some inspiration from tomorrow's community game *wink wink*
Kylectt74- I don't run fast.
- Posts : 22
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