A good Joke

A family are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her sons innocence, the mother turns around and says "Don't worry; that was an insect."To which her son replies, "i'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that."

haha good one, thanks for the share.

DeadApe wrote:haha good one, thanks for the share.

Your Welcome

Lol

Sam R83 wrote:A family are driving behind a garbage truck when a dildo flies out and thumps against the windscreen. Embarrassed, and to spare her sons innocence, the mother turns around and says "Don't worry; that was an insect."To which her son replies, "i'm surprised it could get off the ground with a cock like that."

Are we really doing this?

To be honest, it wasn't even that funny.

You got a giggle out of me, that's it.

Steps to being the best Joke;

1. Drink plenty of fluids. (Flavors optional)
2. Upon reaching a full bladder, seek out nearest restroom facilities.
3. Enter a stall, assume a stance in-front of a toilet.
4. Unzip/Remove pants.
5. Look down.

Whole lot of haters in this thread.

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

DeadApe wrote:Whole lot of haters in this thread.

A man escapes from prison where he has been for 15 years. He breaks into a house to look for money and guns and finds a young couple in bed.
He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair, while tying the girl to the bed he gets on top of her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.
While he's in there, the husband tells his wife: "Listen, this guy's an escaped convict, look at his clothes! He probably spent lots of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck." If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you. Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you. This guy is probably very dangerous. If he gets angry, he'll kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you."
To which his wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked me if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong honey. I love you too!!"

Haha good one

A black guy walks into a bar with a parrot on his shoulder. "Wow," says the bartender. "That is really something. Where'd you get it?"

"Africa," says the parrot.

Oh god Mexi Can that one took me by surprise.

A bear walks into a bar and asks the bartender:

I would like......a drink.

The bartender responds back "Why the big paws?"

Two tramps were walking along the railroad tracks one day and one tramp said to the other, "I'm the luckiest guy in the world".

"Why is that?" said the other tramp.

"Well, I was walking down these tracks last week and I found a £20. I went into town and bought a case of wine and was drunk for three days."

The other tramp said, "That was pretty good, but I think I'm the luckiest guy in the world. I was walking down these very tracks about two weeks ago, and just up ahead was a gorgeous naked woman tied to the tracks. I untied her and took her up there in the trees and I had sex with her for two days."

"Jesus", said the first tramp. "You are the luckiest guy; did you get a blow job, too?"

"Well", the other tramp said, "No, I never found her head."

Nice Joke Cry

When in a public restroom and in a stall:

Grunt and strain real loud for 30 seconds and then drop a cantaloupe into the toilet bowl from a high place six to eight feet. Sigh relaxingly.

A man walked to a primary school at home time for the children.
One young teacher approached the man and asked him 'so which child is yours?' To which the man replied,
'I don't mind, surprise me.'



My wife came home from work crying yesterday and asked me to console her.

So I hit her over the head with my Xbox.

Women's basketball

A man went to Japan to play golf with some of his buisness executives

First he went and got a prostitute and had sex while she kept screaming something in Japanese

So the next day he go to play golf. On the Frist hole he hits a hole-in-one and screams what the Japanese prositute said

The 2 Japanese buisness executives look at each other and go "what do you mean wrong hole?"

a pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch
to which the bartender replies whats with the steering wheel
the pirate then says "AAAAARRRGGGHHH its driving me nuts"

I got a call from the PSN, they said my account information may have been compromised.

So I call the police, they ask if I'd like to report a crime.

I say maybe, then hang up as I cackle.

This topic.

BLACK SNOW 13 wrote:This topic.

No, you.

I was walking down the street eating a burger when a small dog started jumping up at me and barking, the owner apologised and said "He can just smell the meat"
So i replied, "Mind if i throw him a bit?", she said "Go for it"

I picked the dog up and threw it in front of a bus.

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. Then it hit me.



HAHAHAHAHHA