Meaningless Battle IV: And The Heavens Shall Tremble (Game Topic)

Lady Gaga (Played by NickisanEnigma)
The hit pop singer is coming to the Meaningless Battle! Whether you love her or hate her, you can't deny the fact that her music is catchy as hell; listen to it long enough, and you'll find yourself... caught in a bad romance.

Telephone [Active]
(1 EP, cause target to drop their item and give them a Telephone. Telephone causes the player to take 50 DMG at the end of each round unless they spend 1 EP to try to call Lady Gaga; doing so negates the damage for the round, and has a 1/3 chance to drop the Telephone and destroy it)
You're not gonna reach that telephone.

Bad Romance [Active]
(1 EP, once per round, target enemy becomes caught in a Bad Romance. Whenever they are attacked directly, Lady Gaga will follow up and attack them for an additional 50 DMG. If they attack Lady Gaga, half of the DMG is inflicted on themselves. Lasts 3 rounds, may not be used on a target who is already in a Bad Romance. Only two targets may be enthralled at a time.)
I want your love, I want your revenge, I want your love, I don't wanna be friends!

Edge of Glory [Passive]
(Lady Gaga's damage against targets below half health is increased by 50%)
I'm on the edge of something final we call life...

Just Dance [Passive]
(If a target uses a direct attack against Lady Gaga, they have a 20% chance to start dancing, negating the attack. If the attack connects, the chance increases by 20% until this ability succeeds. The chance resets to 20% once it succeeds or if the character does not attack Gaga for a round.)
It'll be okay. Da doo doot doot-n just dance.

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Hadrian Kifhern (Played by ApocalypseVVolf)
An expert hunter and trapper, Hadrian didn't believe the stories he'd heard about werewolves--until he became one. Though society wouldn't easily acclimate to such a character, the Meaningless Battle welcomes Hadrian with open arms.

Transform [Active]
(0 EP, one use per round. Change from Human to Werewolf form and vice versa, can only use special abilities while in the proper form.)

Track [Passive, Both Forms]
(If a player inflicted with a Wound has a higher initiative before bonuses, Hadrian will automatically switch Initiative with them. If two Wounded players tie it will default to the lower HP.)
An expert hunter, Hadrian is attuned to the scent of a bleeding foe, and in seeking them out can find an advantage.

Human Form Abilities:
Hide [Active, Human Form]
(1 EP, Hides the user until attacked or they spend 1 EP unhiding themself; while hidden, all directly targeted DMG has an 80% chance to miss. If an attack hits, Hadrian is no longer hidden, and it deals 50 additional damage. While hiding, can only change forms, pick up items, and use Ambush.)

Trap [Active, Human Form]
(1 EP, may not attack or use special abilities other than transforming in the same turn. The user places a trap; specify a number 1-10. The next person to land on that Initiative before bonuses will take 80 damage and have a 50% chance to lose one action; if Hadrian is in hiding, he will shoot them from his hiding spot for an additional 80 damage. In the event of an initiative tie the target is selected randomly.)

Intellect [Passive, Human Form]
(If an item has an active effect, it can only be used while in human form.)
Werewolf no use computer so good...

Werewolf Form Abilities:
Ambush [Active, Werewolf Form]
(1 EP, can only use while hiding, 200 DMG to a target and pins them to the ground; next round, each action they use other than defending will inflict 50 additional DMG against them. Can only use Ambush against a target of lower initiative. Cannot use in the same turn that the user has Hidden.)

Devour [Active, Werewolf Form]
(1 EP, one use per round, devours the corpse of a deceased player, recovers 35x user's base Initiative in HP. At the beginning of each round, all dead characters gain a stack of "Decomposed" status, to a maximum of 3; a decomposed character will heal for 1/3 less for each stack, and characters with 3 stacks cannot be consumed.)
The Werewolf can consume his fallen enemies for sustenance, but over time they will decompose, making it imperative that he arrives at his kill as soon as possible

Lacerate [Active, Werewolf Form]
(1 EP, deal 90 DMG to target player and inflict a Wound upon them. Wounds will bleed for 10 damage each round and stack up to 4 times; a player can spend their second EP in a round bandaging their wounds to get rid of them. Only one wound can be applied per round)
The Werewolf's claws are able to tear through the thickest of hides--not least for human flesh

Rend and Tear [Passive, Werewolf Form]
(At the beginning of each round, the Werewolf attacks any character with the same initiative as him before bonuses; deals 50 DMG and applies on-hit effects of status or items where applicable)
Any person that draws close to the Werewolf, or is too slow to avoid him, is unable to escape a quic strike in passing

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Bugface (Played by Kugeth)
A sandraider on the lost planet of EDN III, Bugface is know the world over for fighting freakin HUGE akrid, and getting more than halfway there. He's amassed massive amounts of Thermal Energy (T-Eng) and ready once again take back the land that was lost. To all the warriors of MB IV, if you can hear his voice, then you will know what happens when you threaten Bugface's home.

"It's a Freakin' HUGE Akrid!" [Passive]
(All of Bugface's attacks deal an extra +50 DMG when dealt to enemies that have 500 or more HP than Bugface)
Bugface taps into his indomitable spirit, and the strength of his resolve to overcome enemies that are far greater than he.

Not Even Halfway There [Active]
(2 EP, Bugface harvests T-ENG from the local akrid infestation, refilling his T-ENG reserves to their maximum)
"We've been circling for days. . ." "We're already her-" "WE'RE NOT EVEN HALFWAY THERE YET"

Grapple [Active]
(1 EP, 150 T-ENG, 3 turn cooldown, Bugface uses his trusty grappling hook to avoid the attacks of all players with lower Initiative than his in the round this is used)
*Press B!* "What the- OH MY GOD"

Plasma Cannon [Active]
(1 EP, 350 T-ENG, inflicts 300 DMG to a single enemy)
Why is this the best weapon ever?! *shoots the ground accidentally*

Harmonizer[Active]
(1 EP, 150 T-ENG, +100 HP, uses the power of the Harmonizer to gain superhuman regenerative abilities)
AW GAWD, HE'S GOT A HARMANIZA!

Four Days Worth of Thermal Energy [Passive]
(All of Bugface's abilities consume a certain amount of T-Eng. He starts out with a full tank on 500 units of T-Eng. At the end of each turn, Bugface also loses 50 T-Eng for life support. If Bugface's T-Eng reserves go to zero, he will take 100 damage at the end of his turn.)
"Well, I guess its better than nothing, but it isn't really worth it if you ask me."

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Byakuya Kuchiki (Played by Namorg)
The Soul Reaper who participated in the first Meaningless Battle returns for another shot at glorious victory! Will he be able to take the crown in a battle with new competitors?

Senkei [Active]
(1-2 EP, use in response to any attack or ability that targets you this round if the attacker has lower Initiative. That ability will be reflected back to its user, and strike at the end of next round. The ability can be deflected with double damage at the cost of one more EP; however, Byakuya will begin the next round with only one action if this option is chosen.)
Byakuya's attacking style also allows him to defend himself by summoning rows of blades that will defend those inside from any attack

Flash Step [Active]
(1 EP, once per round. Deals "35(User's Initiative) - 10(Target's Initiative)" DMG)
Kuchiki can attack through Flash Steps, allowing to mercilessly destroy opponents if he is fast enough--oftentimes, they are unable to see him attack.

Whirlwind Blades [Active]
(1 EP, when used, all players who act later than Kuchiki and take any action other than defending have a 50% chance per action to take 90 damage at the end of the turn)
Kuchiki is able to surround the battlefield in a void of swirling razors; with this, any part of combat becomes a deadly affair

Senbonzakura [Passive]
(Normal attacks are unblockable.)
Using thousands of small blades, Kuchiki's style becomes difficult to guard against

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The Piano Man (Played by Made in Finland)
Billy Joel in name only, this Piano Man has fallen on hard times in his life. Surprisingly, he's become quite good at the blues; will his talents hold up in the Meaningless Battle?

Imbuing Melody [Active]
(1 EP, once per round, cannot be avoided. Target player begins next round with +1 EP (Bonus EP remains until used) and +5 Initiative, Piano Man recovers 100 HP. Target player is immune to this effect for 3 rounds after use. If the target player uses the bonus to attack the Piano Man, all damage he causes them until the end of the following round will be increased by 100. The Piano Man cannot select himself as the target of this ability.)
Through music, the Piano Man can build up the other patrons of the battle. He doesn't take criticism kindly, however.

Haunting Melody [Active]
(1 EP, once per round. The Piano Man deals 40 damage to the target player each time they use an action for their next two actions. In addition, the damage of those actions is reduced by 40)
The Piano Man plays a haunting melody as a backdrop to the actions of a selected character.

Reflections [Active]
(1 EP, target any player. The Piano Man will gain the next special ability they use for 3 rounds. This ability can be used on multiple characters at a time, but the status will fade from them as soon as one character uses a special ability. Once one is gained, Reflections cannot be used again until the effect is entirely over)
He said "Son, can you play me a memory? I'm not really sure how it goes... But it's sad and it's sweet, and I knew it complete, when I wore a younger man's clothes..."

Lyricist [Passive]
(The Piano Man does not attend Round 1 of Meaningless Battle. He also begins play with 1800 HP.)
What? He's not much of a fighter. Just needs some time to write a few songs about the other guys.

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Gabe Newell (Played by Slacker Hero)
Hi, my name is Gabe Newell, and welcome to Meaningless Battle IV. When we released the original Meaningless Battle in 2010, it was an experiment to see how players reacted to different types of characters and abilities in a turn-based format. Meaningless Battle resonated with players in a way that no other forum game has. The challenges for us in Meaningless Battle IV were to live up to people's expectations, and take you back to the world of the Battle and Tournament Master Eaglendia--and I think you'll be pleasantly surprised. To listen to a commentary node, put your crosshair over the floating commentary symbol and press the Use key. Please let me know what you think after you've had the chance to play Meaningless Battle IV. Thanks, and have fun!

Drop Hat [Active]
(1 EP, once per round, receive a random Hat at the end of the current round. All Hats have an equal chance of being dropped. When used with no hat, Gabe Newell will automatically put on the hat. When used while wearing a hat, that hat will be ejected into storage. If Gabe Newell loses his worn hat, he will automatically don the one from storage.)
Baseball Bill's Sports Shine: A worthless hat! Gabe Newell gains 50 HP and receives no hat. Can go over the maximum HP.
Brigade Helm: Pyro Hat. Wearer's attacks inflict an unstoppable burn that deals 10 damage a round for 3 rounds. If thrown, deals 120 damage and applies the same effect.
Scotsman's Stove Pipe: Demoman hat. Wearer's normal attacks can target up to 3 people. If thrown, deals no damage and destroys the target's item. If the target has no item, deals 175 damage.
Pugilist Protector: Heavy hat. Wearer deals 25% less damage but also takes 25% less damage (stacks with defense.) If thrown, deals 50 damage and causes the target to lose 1 EP the next round.
Master's Yellow Belt: Sniper hat. Wearer's attacks have a 20% chance to deal 50 bonus damage. If thrown, deals 100 unblockable damage.
Noh Mercy: Spy hat. Attacks against the wearer have a 20% chance to be redirected to a random target. If thrown, causes the target's next attack to be redirected to a random target.
Physician's Procedure Mask: Medic hat. The wearer gains 15 HP each turn. If thrown, deals 280 damage, but heals the target for half of the damage done at the end of the turn.
Alien Swarm Parasite: Deals 50 damage to the holder each turn for 3 turns! If thrown, the target gains starts the next 3 rounds with 1 bonus EP... But Gabe Newell decides how it is spent!
Bonk Helmet: Scout hat. The wearer receives +3 Initiative. If thrown, the target suffers -5 Initiative for 2 rounds!
Gabe Newell manipulates the drop rates of TF2 hats to immediately receive an item.

Hat Trade [Active]
(1 EP, give player the passive effect of either of your hats for 3 rounds. Cannot be used on a target with a hat; players other than Gabe have no hat storage)
-OR-
(1 EP, switch your worn hat with your stored hat)
-OR-
(1 EP, throw either of your hats at other player as an attack)
"Pricing is a service, right? It’s an opportunity to increase the value of the thing you do by giving each person what, for them, is the optimal combination of benefits and components and costs, and each person is going to have their own optimal way of doing that." ~ Gabe Newell on microtransactions

Gabewich [Active]
(1 EP, once per turn. Targets a player. If they have any EP left, they lose it and give 40 of their HP to Gabe Newell for each one. In addition, Gabe Newell begins the next round with the amount of lost EP as bonus EP. This move takes place after all other moves.)
Gabe Newell slowly makes his way toward a targeted player and attempts to force-feed them such things as the legendary Gabewich or the cake from Portal

Slow Start [Passive]
(Gabe Newell's Initiative rolls are between 3 and 7 instead of 1 and 10. His initiative cannot be reduced by other characters)
"The fundamental reason was because we underestimated the amount of work left to do and how long it was going to take, especially when the team were so demoralised after the leak." ~ Gabe Newell on the delay of Half-Life 2

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Fatman (Played by Fattyboy)
A member of Dead Cell, this expert engineer built an atomic bomb--at the age of ten! Now, he brings his talents to the Meaningless Battle, along with a slew of explosives and a suit that protects him from attacks and explosives.

Time Bomb [Active]
(1 EP, plants a time bomb on target character. Each round, that character's Initiative will be added to the bomb's Charge Time; when a bomb's Charge Time reaches 20, it will explode at the end of the round, dealing 350 damage. Only one bomb may be on each character.)
Fatman plants a bomb so powerful that it necessitates a character's defense

Experimental Bomb [Active]
(1 EP, 50% chance to deal 165 damage to a character that cannot be blocked or reduced)
This explosive was designed to burn away a target's armor, but it may not work

C4 Charge [Active]
(1 EP, select an Initiative number and plant a C4 charge on it. Only one C4 charge can be active at a time, you may not use this in the same turn you detonate a charge)
-OR-
(0 EP, detonate your C4 charge, dealing 200 damage to all players on that Initiative before bonuses. Players within 1 Initiative of that number (before and after bonuses) take 100 damage, and you can damage yourself with this ability)
A powerful explosive that can also be easily controlled by a bomber of such great intelligence

Bomb Suit [Passive]
(Any attack of 160 damage or higher is reduced by 40 damage before defense. Residual damage from burns and status effects is always reduced by half. Fatman has a persistent -2 Initiative.)
Fatman's suit is designed to resist explosions and cushion his spine if he is knocked down. Though he is able to quickly skate around, the large suit impedes his movement.

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Ezio Auditore da Firenze (Played by Meatshield)
Ezio Auditore is the main protagonist in Assassin's Creed 2 and Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood. While wielding a hidden blade as well as other trademark tools of the assassin, Ezio fights for honor and his family in order to defeat the evil Templars.
"I have lived my life to the best of my ability, but I have not been able to escape fate, anger, or pain."

Trained Assassin [Passive]
(If Ezio and his target have never exchanged damage, his normal attack deals 3 times the amount. This attack can not be reduced below 200 DMG.)
"Do not fear the darkness, but welcome its embrace." ~ Ezio Auditore

Hire Ezio [Passive]
(1 EP, once per round, can be used by any player except Ezio. Hire Ezio to deal 200 DMG to a target. Gives Ezio 100 HP when used)
"It is a good life we lead, brother..."

Hire Assassin [Active]
(1 EP, -200 HP, creates an Assassin NPC that can be hired by Ezio or any other player to deal 50 damage to a single target. Assassins can be hired once per turn by Ezio or any other player at no EP cost to deal 50 damage to a single target; hiring Ezio's assassins rewards him 50 HP. Assassins will also not attack Ezio)

Smoke Grenade [Active]
(1 EP, once per turn, cannot be used two turns consecutively. 50% of all attacks targeted directly at Ezio after this move is used will miss. Can only be used 5 times during the game)
Ezio tosses a smoke grenade at the floor below him--but he has a limited supply.

Initiative Bonus [Passive]
(+1 Initiative)

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John Williams (Played by Robochips)
John Williams has been a famous composer for six decades. Some of his major works include the music for Star Wars, Jaws, Indiana Jones, E.T., Jurassic Park, and the list goes on. Mr. Williams heard about this battle from an old friend and decided to join into the fray. He has the ability to bring the films he helped create into reality, and he is working on composing a theme for this battle.

Jurassic Park [Active]
(1 EP, 3 round cooldown, summons 3 Raptor NPCs to the field with 150 HP. Raptors attack one random person each turn for 50 DMG, with John's initiative. John cannot be attacked by Raptors. A player may not be attacked more than four times by Raptors in a turn)
John Williams tunes into the thoughts of John Hammond to summon raptors to the field.
“Hold onto your butts.”

Star Wars - The Rebellion [Active]
(1 EP, target one player to be protected by Rebel Fighters. On the following round, any character that directly damages that player will take 50 DMG for each instance at the end of the round)
“Its a trap!” ~ Admiral Ackbar

Star Wars - The Empire [Active]
(1 EP, 5 round cooldown, cannot be used until Round 5. Targets one character and summons the Death Star to the field at the end of the turn; the Empire places an Embargo on that character. If that character uses EP in any way other than defending, the Embargo is broken, and the Death Star will fire a beam at them at the end of the round that deals 800 DMG. Embargo lasts 2 rounds)
John Williams has practiced conducting Darth Vader's theme thousands of times to prepare to summon the Death Star to the battlefield, and fire a star-destroying ray at a single player.
"Fear is the path to the dark side."

Indiana Jones [Active]
(1 EP, once per round. 60% chance to steal an item from targeted player and replace it with a Bag of Sand. Bags of Sand can be thrown at another player for 25 DMG at the cost of 1 EP and cannot be dropped)
John Williams can call upon Indiana Jones whenever he needs someone to talk to; because they're drinking buddies, the adventurous Dr. Jones isn't afraid to lend a hand in the battle.
“We have top men working on it now. Top Men.”

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Mr. Tophat (Played by Tophat)
The mysterious man returns to the battle; what the previous tournament's competitors mistook for his death was actually his means of acheiving freedom from that damned cursed coin. Yeah, coin was cursed the whole time. Why do you think the damn thing never came up heads when you needed it to? Obviously cursed.[i]

Proposition For You [Active]
(1 EP | Propose an alliance to one character, who may spend 1 EP to accept the alliance. When a member of the alliance takes damage, it is distributed evenly among the members. All damage dealt by alliance members is increased by 10 for each member of the alliance. There is a maximum of 3 people in the Alliance. After a character is in the alliance for 5 rounds, they will automatically drop out.)
-or-
(1 EP | Disband the alliance or remove another character from it. If the only characters remaining in the game are in Tophat's alliance, it will automatically be disbanded.)
[i]"I've got a plan that'll get both of us out of here alive. Listen up..."

Death Wish [Active]
(1 EP, once per round. Deals damage to a target equal to 10% of their missing HP. Cannot be used while in an alliance)
"Seems like I still got some of that old curse left in me... that makes two of us, now."

Intimidation [Passive]
(When a member of Tophat's alliance uses a normal attack, the target suffers a -1 Initiative penalty next round. Can only be activated once per character per round.)
The patrons of Meaningless Battle are intimidating alone... but together?

Black Vengeance [Passive]
(If a character attacks Tophat while in his alliance, they are removed from it. In addition, they are flagged with Black Vengeance for 2 rounds. Tophat's normal attack deals 100 extra damage against players with Black Vengeance.)
"You just made the worst mistake of your life."

Predestination [Passive]
(Mr. Tophat has a maximum of 1800 HP. If a character tries to use the same normal attack or special ability twice in a row against Tophat, the second will miss.)
Though Tophat is not a warrior, he is blessed with good fortune.

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Golan Rovanel (Played by Sir Manguydude)
A half-elf shunned from society in his youth, Golan ultimately embarked on a quest to seal a gate to an untamed, primordial power! He charged forth, intent to destroy it in an act of heroic sacrifice, but instead found himself in another universe--as a contestant in the Tournament Master's game!

Aurora Slash [Active]
(1 EP | 100 DMG to one target and 75 to all targets of same initiative)
-or-
(1 EP | 80 DMG to two targets and -3 Initiative to them next round, does not stack)
-or-
(1 EP | 150 DMG to one target, once per round)
Golan's dark sword, called Abyssion, can channel magic energy in many different ways.

Berserk [Active]
(0 EP | One use at 500 or lower HP, must be first action in round | Gives Golan an additional EP on the round this is used and for four rounds afterward. For this duration, Aurora Slash's 3rd option can be used twice per round. Golan also gains a +3 Initiative Bonus)
Golan calls upon his rage in battle against his enemies, preparing to use Abyssion's strongest techniques.
"Sacred powers, cast your purifying light upon these corrupt souls!"

Overdrive [Passive]
(Once Golan falls below 1200 HP, he gains Overdrive status. Overdrive status causes a +4 Initiative bonus, his normal attack inflicts 125 DMG, and Aurora Slash's effects are increased by 30 DMG. During a round, Golan cannot be affected at all by characters that are 7 or more Initiative lower than him.)
In an emergency situation, Golan is able to send his Helios Armor into Overdrive. The Helios Armor increases his speed, and foes that cannot keep pace with him are unable to track his movement!

Inner Fury [Passive]
(When Golan takes more than 400 DMG in a single round, the effects of "Overdrive" and "Berserk" are activated for 3 rounds regardless of his HP)
Golan can respond to a powerful attack by overcharging his armor immediately.

Helios Armor [Passive]
(Golan starts the battle with 2400 HP and is unable to defend. Golan is immune to the Possessed Prodigy's "Research".)
Rovanel's armor and stamina afford him great longevity in battle, but he tends to challenge any opponent head-on, regardless of their strength.

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Colonel Genesis (Played by Prof Vanguard)
As a member of the prestigious Genesis family, Samuel holds others to almost impossibly high standards. Reaching across the Void, the Colonel of the Sigmatic Army seeks to bring order to the corruption of the Meaningless Battle arena through his own victory. “Such a vulgar amalgam of warriors, all of different realms. I detest whatever ignorant architect brought them all together, but, by Cor, I’ll bring them all down.”

Digamma [Active]
(2 EP & 2 SP | Genesis delivers a devastating beam of Sigmatic energy to an opponent, dealing 300 damage. If the target is defending, their defense is stopped.)
“My power is but an extension of our God’s design. I am a node in his grand matrix.”

Reflect [Active]
(1 EP & 1 SP | The next attack to hit Genesis after this ability is used is reflected back to the user)
“You could not have thought it would be that easy.”

The Sigma Wrecks [Active]
(2 EP & 1 SP | After this effect is used all attacks Genesis makes will deal 5% more damage. This effect stacks indefinitely)
“I will only grow stronger. You cannot stop the Sigmatic flow.”

Summon Dominic [Active]
(1 EP & 5 SP | Deals 100 damage to Genesis upon use | Genesis summons Dominic onto the field by using his wrist band as raw material. This ability may only be used once. Dominic has his own initiative roll, deals 50 damage with each attack, and cannot defend. He has 3 EP per turn, and a max HP of 800.)

Spoiler:

“I cannot believe that you have managed to force me into this course of action. You’ll regret this.”

Sigmatic Fury [Passive]
(Genesis enters the battle with his arm studded with 5 gems of concentrated Sigmatic power (1 gem = 1 SP))
“This arm is not for show. This arm will bring justice to a corrupt world.”

Charge [Passive]
(Whenever Genesis defends he regains one SP through concentration, to a maximum of 7)
“Do not assume I’ve ascended military ranks solely through my family name. What you may have forgotten is that the name is synonymous with hard work and dedication.”

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Possessed Prodigy (Played by Black Snow)
Favorite intern of the Mage for Radioactive research, no other info is available.

Gamma Ray [Active]
(2 EP | Deals a random amount between 200 and 250 DMG to a target. 2 round cooldown.)
An invisible ray of gamma particles fired from the hand in a swift motion.

Decay Grip [Active]
(1 EP | Deals 100 damage to a target. Inflicts them with Decay, which deals 25 damage a round for 3 rounds)
-or-
(2 EP | Reduces the effectiveness of a target's defense by 25% until the status is removed through an ulterior effect. After this effect is activated, Decay Grip can no longer be used)
Being around radioactive material has made this Prodigy a walking hazard to all.

Research [Active]
(1 EP | Target one character and attempt to find their weakness; this ability has a 75% chance of success. If it works, the Possessed Mage will deal 30% more damage against them for 3 rounds, or until they deal 300 or more damage to him)
The lust for knowledge is hard to overcome for such an academic.

Release Info [Active]
(1 EP | Remove the bonus damage against a target from Research from yourself, but give it to up to two other characters for two rounds)
Sharing is nice, especially if it help others hurt your enemy.

Meltdown [Passive]
(If the Possessed Mage is attacked by 3 or more people in the same round, half the damage he took is spread evenly among the attackers at the end of the round)
Stress leads to anger--it's self explanatory.

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The Plaguemaster (Played by Harbinger)
Hailing from Northr, er, Norway, the Plaguemaster is an expert virologist. He has joined the meaningless battle after deciding that all of his buddies at the Necropolis he worked at were being too soft on the guys trying to kill them all.

The Infection [Passive]
(Infection has a 50% chance to spread to anyone who uses an attack on an Infected individual, or anyone an Infected individual directly damages. Infection is cured after 4 turns of infection. Effects change depending on number of infected individuals)
The Plaguemaster can introduce an infection to the battle using a number of his abilities

Spoiler:

Contagion [Active]
(1 EP | Infects a target character as long as no other characters are infected.)

Safety Dance [Active]
(2 EP | 3 turn cooldown | 3 random characters take 100 DMG, 20% chance to infect targets; if targets are already infected, resets duration)
The Plaguemaster causes toxic slime to erupt from cracks in the ground, and some people just can't stay out of the fire.

Spore [Passive]
(1 EP | 3 turn cooldown | Sends out a Spore with 150 HP. Whoever destroys it gains a 20% DMG increase for 3 rounds, and has a 50% chance to become infected. Immune to damage from Infected players and the Plaguemaster. If the spore is not killed in 5 turns it detonates, dealing 100 DMG to a random player)

Mr. Bigglesworth [Passive]
(Plaguemaster brings in his kitten, Mr. Bigglesworth. Bigglesworth has 10 HP and will mewl adorably each turn)
"You will not escape your fate...!"

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The Red Marker (Played by Garquin)
A human-constructed duplicate of an actual alien artifact discovered on Earth. The activation of Marker 3A was designed to observe the effects of the activation of the real artifact; however, the marker's activation instead resulted in the release of a recombinant infection that released beings called Necromorphs, which reproduce using corpses as a medium. Why the Tournament Master brought it here is anyone's guess.

Marker 3A [Passive]
(The Red Marker has 2750 HP and cannot attack or defend. It begins each round with 3 EP. The Red Marker cannot be in Alliance with Mr. Tophat. Each round, if there are any Demented characters, the Marker will trade base Initiative with the highest one.)
"The Marker? This 'divine relic? Made by man."

Make Us Whole Again [Active]
(1 EP | Once per round | Target player cannot attack the Marker until a full round has passed. Cannot target a player who was affected last round; once the effect ends, another round must pass until it can be used on them again)
The Marker deceives a player with horrifying images or a hallucination of a loved one to protect itself from destruction.

Dementia [Active]
(2 EP | Target character suffers from Dementia. Dementia lasts for 5 rounds by default, but a character can attempt to recover as an action with no EP cost; initally, there is a 20% chance to recover, but it increases by 10% each round until the character is freed or frees themself from Dementia. A Demented character has a skewed sense of reality; as such, they can only attack The Marker, Necromorphs, and other Demented characters. Attempting to recover must be the last action a player takes in their turn)
Were the Marker not sentient, it would still be quite easy to go insane looking at it; the artifact is covered in incomprehensible symbols, each one with a thousand meanings--these are the genetic codes that comprise the recombinant Necromorph infection.

Generate Hallucination [Active]
(1 EP | Creates a hallucination of a chosen Necromorph. There is a limit of five Necromorphs. These hallucinations only exist to Demented players, and cannot attack or be attacked by others. Necromorphs share Initiative with The Marker. Each round, two individual necromorphs can use their action, decided by the Marker; each individual Necromorph can only act once per round)

Spoiler:

"What the hell are those things? Is that the crew?"

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King Maverick (Played by Mboddz)
King Maverick rules the Liberty City streets, hunting savages from the sky--and is now coming to the arena of the Meaningless Battle! Is King Maverick the pilot, or the helicopter? Nobody really knows, but one thing is for sure--it's coming.

Police Chopper [Passive]
(King Maverick has 1400 HP and brings two side gunners to the battlefield with 375 HP each. Due to a lack of actual weapons, King Maverick cannot utilize a normal attack, and gains only 1 EP per round. Due to being a fucking helicopter, King Maverick has a persistent +3 Initiative)
"We'll be loading up on weapons and meeting at---who the hell is Caesar, and why are you firing your ammunition into the air?"

Health Pack [Passive]
(King Maverick cannot use items. If King Maverick picks up an item, he will instead receive a Health Kit which will restore 20% of his missing health and disappear instantly. Sidegunners will have 50% of their missing health restored, unless dead)
"Yeah, the green box. You just sort of take that and... rub it on your car, and you're set."

Strafing Run [Active]
(0 EP | Once per sidegunner per turn | Fires 2 shots, dealing 50 DMG each; you may target them at the same character or at different characters. This counts as the Sidegunner performing a normal attack)
"That wasn't the machine gun... it was the passenger."

Rotor Ram [Active]
(1 EP | Deals 180 unblockable DMG at the cost of 10% of King Maverick's remaining health)
"As violent as it is educational--King Maverick just taught me how a lawnmower works."

"It's coming." [Active]
(1 EP | Cannot be used for the first three rounds | Causes one enemy to say "It's coming." At the end of the following round, deals damage equal to King Maverick's remaining HP to King Maverick and that player. King Maverick must take this damage, and it cannot be avoided by his target)
"It was like the end of the world. The intersection was blocked by a wall of smoke... all I saw were explosions and naked people with knives..."

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Kratos (Played by Coggy)

Fury of The Gods [Active]
(2 EP | Strikes a single target for 25% of their current HP as DMG. Cannot be used until 500 HP has been lost between all active characters; the use of this move does not count towards this total. After use, this 500 HP count will begin again. The damage of this move may not be increased or reduced)
Kratos delights in bloodshed, and after spending time surrounded by battle can channel the power of the gods into a single attack

Chaos Cyclone [Active]
(1 EP | Once per turn | 125 DMG to up to 3 targets)
Kratos lashes out at multiple characters with unparalleled speed and animosity

Hades' Gamble [Active]
(1EP | Sacrifices an amount of HP up to 200 to boost the damage of Kratos's normal attack by that amount. Lasts for two rounds; further Hades Gambles refresh the duration and increase the boost to a maximum attack damage of 300. A minimum of 50 HP must be used; the damage this ability inflicts on Kratos may not be reduced)
Increases power exponentially--at the cost of life

Lasting Wounds [Active]
(1 EP | Kratos attacks a target inflicting large wounds. The target will take 25 damage at the end of each round for six rounds, or until they expend an EP to cancel the effect)
Kratos's weapon rends the flesh as well as the fighting spirit

Trade [Passive]
(When Kratos's health drops below 500, all damage taken is reduced by 25%; however, Kratos's attacks also deal 25% less damage than normal)
As a murderer of gods, Kratos's staying power in battle is unmatched

A refresher in basic actions--unless otherwise ruled by an effect, these actions will cost 1 EP.
Attack: Deals 100 damage to an opponent of choice.

Defend: Until the end of the round, all damage taken is halved. Defending must be the last action you take in a round. (You can defend after you attack, but not vice versa.) If you defend and try to use another action afterward, it will be negated!

Special Ability; All player characters have at least one unique Special Ability. They vary from character to character, but the effects will vary. Some special abilities may do damage, while others may alter the rules of the game.

--ITEMS--
- As if it weren't interesting enough, items will randomly appear on the battlefield. You can pick them up and use them provided you're still alive.
- If an item appears, pick it up by simply being the first to post that you're doing so. This does not take an EP. You may only have one item at a time, and picking up an item counts as the first move of a round.
- Unclaimed items remain on the battlefield. If you have an item, you may discard it at any time without consuming an action.

NEW MECHANIC: INITIATIVE
In the status report of each round, a number will precede your character's name. This number represents Initiative. Base Initiative is rolled 1-10 each round for all characters. Instead of getting your actions out earlier than the other person, actions will now resolve in order from highest to lowest initiative each round; this time around it doesn't matter who posts first, but who's character is moving quicker!
You do, however, have to worry about who posts first if you roll the same Initiative as another player. Pay attention to how actions resolve, as it could come down to that!

Remember: If you don't show up for three consecutive rounds, you will be removed from the game, along with all characters you control. Use your EP--there will be no "camping" in this Battle.
Play with honor. Under no circumstances is editing of posts allowed--and doing so may result in character death or disqualification at the Tournament Master's jurisdiction.
Finally, and most importantly--conduct yourself intellectually. Understand the capabilities of the other characters; not just so you can win, but so this can be an interesting battle.

The game will begin in about 4 hours. (24 hour rounds start and end at 11 PM CST)
Good luck to all competitors.
(I know I left King Maverick out of the poll, but write-ins are okay.)

PICK UP ITEM

(A final note to competitors: If you are using an ability with more than one form, such as Golan's Abyssion or the Prodigy's Decay Grip, please be specific about what you are doing. With that in mind...)

ROUND ONE START
It's eleven o' clock on a Monday, the regular crowd shuffles in...?

PRE-ROUND: Mr. Bigglesworth mewls adorably.

(9+1) Ezio Auditore: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, 5/5 Smoke Bombs
(9) Plaguemaster: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP
(8) Bugface: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, 500/500 T-ENG
(7) Gabe Newell: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP
(8-2) Fatman: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP
(6) Colonel Genesis: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, 5/7 SP
(5) Golan Rovanel: 2400/2400 HP, 2/2 EP
(4) The Marker: 2750/2750 HP, 3/3 EP
(4) Lady Gaga: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP
(1+3) King Maverick: 1400/1400 HP, 1/1 EP
(3) Possessed Prodigy: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, Decay Grip Available
(3) Kratos: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, Fury of the Gods(0/500 DMG)
(3) John Williams: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, Jurassic Park Ready, The Empire(1/5)
(3) Hadrian Kifhern: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP, Human Form
(3) Byakuya Kuchiki: 2000/2000 HP, 2/2 EP
(2) Mr. Tophat: 1800/1800 HP, 2/2 EP

NPCs:
Sidegunner A: 375/375 HP
Sidegunner B: 375/375 HP
Mr. Bigglesworth: 10/10 HP

Remember that the number before the character(Initiative) indicates the order in which actions resolve--you don't actually have to post in that order or anything. A tie in Initiative, however, will result in whoever posts first winning out.

Contagion on Genesis.
Colonel, please accept this gift. I feel it will aid both of us, in time.

Defend

defend

Drop Hat.
Defend.

With TF2, we can do a bunch of things and learn about a bunch of stuff in a way where that audience is happy to go along for the ride. We can’t destroy TF2 by adding funny hats to it.

We can’t destroy TF2 by adding funny hats to it.
We can’t destroy TF2 by adding funny hats to it.
We can’t destroy TF2 by adding funny hats to it.

I Got A Proposition For You: The Marker, King Maverick



I've heard good things about you King Maverick.... and that big rock over there, im hiding behind you...

Its time.




Defend.


If you cant tell my action your a baddie.
(use Jurassic park)

Lady Gaga use defend like a boss.

She's got both hands. In her pockets.

And she won't look at you. Won't look at you.

Create Two Assassins.

"Our guild grows stronger. Who will hire these men?"

Defend

"With your abilities, you will find it impossible to make me fall on even one knee."

Defend.

Use The Sigma Wrecks.

Golan makes sure to avert his eye from making contact with the weird looking rock. He tests his jetpack out, and a slight malfunction sends him flying.

Hire both of Ezio's assassins to attack the Marker.

Hire Ezio to attack the Marker.

Use plasma cannon on the Marker

Defend.

Super Mega King wrote:Defend.

OH YOU